Bouncing back is one of the greatest, if not the most difficult challenges we can have in life. Failures, setbacks, and disappointments are part of our natural life movement. However, they should not be our final movement.
Bouncing back from these failures, setbacks, and disappointments is what we must do. You cannot stay in these moments. Bouncing back takes resilience.
Resilience is our ability to adapt and bounce back when things don't go as planned. Resilient people don't wallow or dwell on failures; they acknowledge the situation, learn from their mistakes, and then move forward.
According to the research of a leading psychologist, there are three elements that are essential to resilience:
- Challenge– Resilient people view a difficulty as a challenge, not as a paralyzing event. They look at their failures and mistakes as lessons to be learned from and as opportunities for growth. They don't view them as a negative reflection of their abilities or self-worth.
- Commitment– Resilient people are committed to their lives and their goals, and they have a compelling reason to get out of bed in the morning. Commitment isn't just restricted to their work. They commit to their relationships, their friendships, the causes they care about, and their religious or spiritual beliefs.
- Personal Control– Resilient people spend their time and energy focusing on situations and events that they have control over. Because they put their efforts where they can have the most impact, they feel empowered and confident. Those who spend time worrying about uncontrollable events can often feel lost, helpless, and powerless to take action.
The good news is that even if you're not a naturally resilient person, you can learn to develop a resilient mindset and attitude. I’ve listed five things that have helped my resilience and my ability to bounce back.
- Learn to relax- When you take care of your mind and body, you're better able to cope effectively with challenges in your life.
- Practice thought awareness- Resilient people don't let negative thoughts derail their efforts. Instead, they consistently practice positive thinking. This means listening to how you talk to yourself when something goes wrong.
- Edit your outlook-Practice cognitive restructuring of your thoughts to change the way that you think about negative situations and bad events. Use those negative moments as pushers not pausers.
- Learn from your mistakes and failures-Every mistake has the power to teach you something important, so look for the lesson in every situation. Also, make sure that you understand the idea of "post-traumatic". I learned of “post-traumatic growth” from my therapist. After every difficult session, he would ask “Now how did you grow from this”.
- Choose your response-Remember, we all experience bad days, and we all go through our share of crises. But we have a choice in how we respond. We can choose to react with panic and negativity, or we can choose to remain calm and logical to take control and find a solution. Your reaction is always up to you. If you can control your response, you can control the situation.
Remember this bouncing back is a choice. Tapping into the resilience that is embedded in you is up to you. Go Be Great and Be Lifted!
